The Gift of Fostering a Child
When most people think of family, they think of relatives connected by blood, a shared last name, or years of memories that trace back to the beginning. But for Pat Freeman, family has a far deeper meaning.
At age 82, Pat Freeman has opened her heart and her home to over 100 children in need, fostering them, loving them, and, in some cases, adopting them. Through each foster placement, she has shown that family is truly where love, stability, and kindness are found. “Our foster children were given the same love, care, and attention as our biological children,” Freeman recalls. “If you do it right, every foster child is truly yours, even if it’s just for a short while.”
Freeman began her story as a military child born in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. With a younger sister and an adopted brother who had special needs, she was no stranger to the idea of family beyond blood. Her father’s service kept the family moving until they settled in Hot Springs, Arkansas, a place where Freeman would return repeatedly. She and her high school sweetheart, Russ, were inseparable. “We met in high school, started going steady, and got married after he returned from boot camp on November 3, 1960,” she said. The couple shared 51 years of marriage before his passing in 2011. Together, they built a family that went far beyond their three biological children.
The inspiration to foster began while the Freemans were stationed in White Sands, New Mexico. “We thought our family was complete, but I always enjoyed having a baby in the house,” she said. When a friend mentioned her adopted child came from foster care, something inside Freeman ignited. Before long, she and Russ were certified foster parents. Their first child, Patty, was a little girl with rosy cheeks who adored mashed potatoes. “We had her for a year and even took her on vacation back to Hot Springs. Though we hoped to keep her, she eventually found her forever family.”
For the Freemans, every child who joined their family became a beloved part of it, bringing their own stories and creating cherished memories. Some were marked by moments like a teenager sneaking out the window for a midnight adventure, while others were as tender as a baby’s first coo of “I love you.” Among them was Angie, a little girl with spina bifida who disliked shoe fittings but loved being told she was pretty.
The Freeman’s home was not just a place for children to sleep and eat. It was a haven, a sanctuary of sorts where they could heal and belong. “Preparing for a new child was always exciting for us,” she explains. “It was like getting ready for a new family member. We would go shopping because most children arrived with little to nothing. Our own kids would be just as excited, waiting eagerly to meet their new sibling.” Over the years, the family grew as they adopted some of the children, turning what began as a family of three into a family of 11. Each addition taught Freeman’s biological children compassion, understanding, and the power of acceptance. “Fostering taught us how powerful stability, kindness, and patience can be for a child,” she says. “When they lived with us, they were family through all the ups and downs.”
Angela Coston, executive director of For The Sake of One, a local Texarkana organization that supports families who foster children in our area, shared how vital foster families like the Freemans are. “At any given time here in Texarkana, we have anywhere from 200 to 300 kids in care across Miller, Bowie, Little River, and Cass counties,” Coston explains. “We have about 20 open foster homes in those counties currently. We support foster, kinship, and adoptive families. We provide support through Parents’ Night Out to give foster parents a three-hour break. We provide monthly support groups and physical supplies in our Blessing Boutique.”
Coston emphasizes that fostering is a challenging journey. “I would tell someone to pray about becoming a foster parent and talk to all members of their family. Fostering affects the entire family, and everyone needs to be on board. We have a huge need in our area and definitely need more foster parents, but I would not say that everyone should foster because it is a hard job.” For The Sake of One’s mission is to share God’s love with local children and families before and after foster care by walking alongside them on their healing journeys. As Coston sees it, fostering isn’t just a service—it’s a calling.
The Freemans didn’t escape the challenges of fostering. Their experience was not without its challenges. Regarding discipline, they were a family who believed in consistency. For the little ones, “no-no” was simply enough. For the older children, explaining the reason behind any punishment was important. Over time, each learned boundaries and structure.
While they found joy and fulfillment in opening their home, there were also moments of heartache, especially when reuniting children with biological families who might have caused the child’s pain. “It was always challenging when biological parents or grandparents, sometimes the ones who had neglected or hurt the children, came for visits,” Freeman said. “We tried to be open-minded, knowing it was probably just as hard for them to be in our home as it was for us to welcome them.” Yet she continued, driven by deep faith and the resilience of her foster children. “People often think they couldn’t love someone else’s child or that foster parents do it for the money. Neither is true. I learned that sometimes children just need to feel loved and accepted to start healing.”
In 1970, when the Freeman family lived in Pensacola, Florida, a six-year-old little boy named Jeff Bates was placed in their home. It was his sixth foster home, and he was only six years old. “I was, as you can imagine, a traumatized child,” shared Bates. “Mamma Pat welcomed me into the family and did her best to ease the pain of this new home. I was also comforted that my biological brother was also in the home because it meant that I wasn’t completely alone. I struggled in my new home and school, and Mamma Pat helped me through the changes, and I was able to adjust.” When the Freeman family relocated to Arkansas in the summer of 1971, Bates and his brother were placed in a new home. Shortly before the Freeman family left Pensacola, the whole family visited him and his brother in their new home to ensure they were okay. “They didn’t have to visit before leaving,” Bates said, “but in doing so, she made sure we were safe and secure—the same thing she did for me the first day I was welcomed into her family.”
Freeman’s story bears witness to the idea that a home is more than just walls, rooms, or the people who share your DNA. A true home is built on love, acceptance, and unwavering support. When looking back on her life, Freeman sees a colorful picture of many different, beautiful little faces all intertwined—hundreds of children who found safety, stability, and love under her very own roof. “It is very hard for a child to leave your home, but if they are being adopted, you know they’re moving into a loving, permanent home,” she reflects. “We would explain to the older kids that the child was going home, reminding them that family ties are strong, and we respected that.” And to anyone considering fostering, Freeman simply offers, “Open your hearts. You’ll receive more than you ever imagined and make memories to last a lifetime.”
In a world where so many children are waiting for a place to call home, Pat Freeman’s story reminds us all that family truly isn’t defined by blood but by something so much stronger. “It’s been a wild, blessed life,” she said. “When people ask how we managed, I always say it was only with God’s help.” With each child welcomed and each sad goodbye, Freeman showed that providing a safe and loving family is one of the greatest gifts we could offer. For those blessed enough to find that love, even if it is only for a short time, it changes everything. And for those willing to open their doors, the rewards are boundless.
